Finally the exams are over...
I can free my mind of all the academic troubles.
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This might not seem like an appropriate time to do an "emo" post to dampen my mood, but it's actually the best time.
Get it out of the way, and start writing about the happier things in life.
Haha.
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So...
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In the past 4 months, I'm very "lucky" to have four very unfortunate events consecutively happening in my life.
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Yeah, so technically it's like one of the downtimes of my life.
Some of it has been resolved; Some is "just there"; Some... ... I really don't know.
It's really been 1 hell of a ride...
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Haiz... let's do some reflections, OK?
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At the same time, I can introduce to everyone 3 extremely good quotes I've learnt.
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1. Moment Of Folly (一失足成千古恨)
OK Lah, 千古 is kinda exaggerated.
But this is one of the dumbest mistake I made very early this year, and I really hated myself for it.
If I was thinking more clearly, If I was more experienced... I wouldn't have commited such an elementary mistake.
So, with a click of a button and a swap, I sealed my fate for the next 3 months...
I only saw the immediate benefit and didn't think about the consequences. I thought I got myself a great bargain, but what I got was hell.
And I paid dearly for this mistake, one that last for 3 long agonizing months.
So the moral of the story is:
Look before you jump.
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Luckily, through strong determination and an undying spirit, I managed to recover from this mistake, possibly with the results being better than I initially thought possible.
I tried and tried, and many times I really feel like giving up. But I guess somehow I manage to persevere through it.
It was a very bad experience, but also one that I learned a lot from.
I guess you can call it a "Painful Lesson".
You just have to keep trying, and never give up till the end.
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And I quote,
"The only time you can't afford to fail is the last time you try." - Charles Kettering
2. A Farce (一场闹剧)
The second one came as a huge shocked to me.
Yeap.
HUGEEEEEEEEE SHOCK.
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But it wasn't really that big of a deal.
Basically, it's a small issue, blown out of proportion by some "super idol" (aka "super idle") people.
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Yep.
Looking back at it now, that is exactly what it is.
Ha.
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Thankfully,
I did what I did.
Not more.
Not less.
And (hopefully have) put an end to this nonsense.
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And so I quote,
"Life is 10% about what happens to you and 90% of how you deal with it." - Charles R. Swindoll
3. Like Stranger (形同陌路)
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The 3rd issue is what pains me the most...
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Yes.
It brought me more pain than almost everything I can think of in the past four months.
I've seriously lost count of how many sleepless nights, headaches, and "emo-days" it has caused me...
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I've done so much, so much.
I offered my help whenever I can. I shared whatever I can share, and I did whatever within my capability.
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So much time together.
So many happy moments...
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But so what?
It doesn't matter.
Because... because I realized...
I realized that all of it can be obliterated.
All of it can be written off, wiped out from history, just like that.
Instantly.
Without me even knowing anything.
Without me even having a chance to react.
Without even giving me a chance to do anything at all.
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And the reason?
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The funny thing is, I don't even know the reason.
HAHA.
How HUMILIATING.
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I don't feel like explaining myself.
I don't feel the need to, because I honestly haven't done anything worthy of such treatment.
Why should I act like I'm the one to blame? Or I'm the one at fault?
And I can't believe the things I've heard.
Haha.
It's like totally contradictory to what I think it is.
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I cherish every single one of my friendship.
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Every single one.
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Every one.
But tell me.
Tell me how can I cherish one that the other party doesn't care?
How can I cherish one in which I'm totally insignificant?
How can I go on to cherish one that after giving so much, what I got in return was just plain harsh, uncaring and sarcastic treatment?
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Everytime, I am left with a feeling of loneliness.
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I am just 1 person. ONE PERSON.
Do you think it is easier for the world to outcast one person, or one person to outcast the world?
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Haiz...
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I'm not going to go on anymore.
I've already lost count of how many entries I've written on this thing, and every single one is just sadder than the previous.
And I'm really tired of this.
This will be the last post on this.
Cause I don't want to be tortured by this anymore.
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If things have to turn out this way, then SO BE IT.
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And my final quote,
"You can’t make anybody feel the way you’d like them to. If they do, it’s wonderful. And if they don’t, you move on." - Nicole Trager, Kyle XY
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