P.S: A portion of this post was removed cause I felt some stuffs aren't suitable to be put up (cause I got a bit too "emo" and wrote too much). So please understand that some parts might not connect too logically.
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Ahh... what an important date to remember. Or should I say, originally an important date. Haha...
Today mark the end of 5 weeks of school. That also meant that I've left the Kindergarten for 5 weeks now. If I haven't choose this path, I'll probably be celebrating now with the others from the September batch~
...
When I made this choice, I already foresee the coming of this day. And there will be many more such days to come. Today, the September batch graduates. Very Soon, the December will, then the March guys, and it goes on.
Well, as for me, I don't regret my decision. They can "suan" me for all they like, but I know I've made the right choice. If I got my "True Freedom" but knows that I'll be doing nothing meaningful for the next 11 months, I don't think I'll be happy.
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The Alternative Solution?
Some people once suggested to accumulate all my "free days" + "skip classes" etc in order to get into NTU this year and at the same time graduate from the Kindergarten. Now that I'm in, I can say with certainty that this method wouldn't have work.
First, given the "nature of work" and the "kind of people" at the Kindergarten, do you think they would allowed this to happen? It's unfair to the others as well.
Second, it would be nearly impossible to catch up 5 weeks of lessons this way (for an indication, just look at me now). It's as good as giving up the entire semester.
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In fact, the life at the Kindergarten actually become one of my greatest source of motivation to study.
I can honestly say that I really cherish studying right now, even when it's tough.
Even when it drains away my energy, even when I can't understand the lectures, even when I feel very stress, even when I feel frustrated.
I still cherish studying. I value it so much BECAUSE I've been through the life at the Kindergarten. And I know how much better it is right now.
...
Everytime I'm tempted to skip lessons, everytime I'm fed up with doing tutorials, everytime I feel mad at doing reports, I always look back and compare with my "previous life".
What would I be doing now? Where would I be at this time? On this day?
Would I rather spend my entire Saturday in my room (with aircon + music + computer) doing tutorials? Or would I rather go out on 15 hours excursions?
Would I rather go sit through some mind-torturing lectures? Or would I transform myself into a statue for 6 hours staring at the moon?
Would I rather burn the midnight oil to rush a report? Or spend the night in fear and agony in some cold dark places?
The choice is clear. There isn't even a single doubt, or even a moment of hesitation in which one I would choose.
...
I always tell myself, I rather DIE STUDYING then DIE STANDING.
I rather collapsed at the study table then faint at some mysterious island.
I rather kill all my brain cells studying then break my back standing.
I rather be suffocated by pile of books then pile of ****.
... ...
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Well, the great thing is...
By the time those "freshies" enter NTU, I'll be in Year 2! And by then I would have gotten by "True Freedom" as well!
Yeah~!
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